Q: I would like to let you know that I have committed the most major sins and I am not saying this in order to take pride in my sins – I used to feel this before but not any longer. I have defeated Satan in many rounds, but he defeated me in more battles. Is it possible for me to return to Allah once again and how?
A: In the name of Allah, Most Gracious, Most Merciful. All praise be to Allah and prayers and salutations to our Prophet Muhammad and his family and companions.
The Prophet (PBUH) said Allah will forgive whoever repents before the sun rises from the west [reported by Muslim from the Hadith of Abu Hurairah].
Nothing prevents you from repenting, even if your sins reach the sky or fill the whole earth. As long as the human being is in this life, the door of repentance is open. You are in the midst of a battle between the call of faith in your heart, and the call of desire that is guided by Satan in your heart.
The heart is not immunized from Satan except with the Zikr (remembrance) of Allah, the Exalted, and it does not have the strength to want good except by doing good deeds. Satan does not defeat the heart unless it is inattentive of the Zikr of Allah, the Exalted and unless it is weak because of vice and sins committed. Take it and maintain it as its results are guaranteed, Allah willing, if you persevere it honestly:
- Keep up the five prayers in congregation, especially the Fajr prayer and never miss it. Allah, the Exalted says “and the fajr reading of the Qur’an , verily the fajr recitation of Qur’an is witnessed,” i.e. the Fajr prayer is witnessed by angels.
- After the Fajr prayer remain in the mosque to read the Qur’an until sunrise, and then offer two Rakahs (prayer units) 10 minutes after sunrise.
- Say Subhan Allah wa bi Hamdihi (may Allah be glorified and praised) one hundred times a day at any time in the mosque or house, whether walking, sitting, in the car, etc. This Zikr wipes out sins.
- Ask forgiveness of Allah one hundred times each day, saying Astaghfirullah wa atoobu ilayh (I ask forgiveness of Allah and I repent to Him), once again at any time you wish and in whatever condition you are in.
- Say this zikr: la ilaha illa Allahu wahdahu la sharika lah, lahul mulk wa lahul hamd wa howa ala kul shayin qadeer (there is no god but Allah; He has no partner; He is the dominion and praise, and He is capable of everything) one hundred times each day at any time you wish and in whatever condition you are.
- Between Maghrib (sunset prayer) and Isha (evening prayer) remain in the mosque and do not leave it, and recite as much as you can of the Qur’an, with full concentration.
- Continue this program for at least a month: living with the Qur’an, reciting it with consideration, and acting upon what is in it; spending time alone for long hours for the Zikr of Allah, the Exalted.
- If the environment in which you live does not support you in applying this program, then change the environment – abandon bad friends, and avoid places that encourage you to commit sins.
- Donate part of your money as a form of repentance to Allah, the Exalted, as charities given in secret are seen only by Allah, the Exalted.
In an authentic Hadith, “Secret charities extinguish the anger of the Lord.” [Narrated by ibn Hibban from the Hadith of Anas]
- Try to perform Umrah with the intention of renewing your faith and cleansing your past with the water of this blessed trip.
11. If you owe anything to others, return that and do not retain anything you will be accounted for, as a form of repentance to Allah.