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57 Ways Of Winning Your Husband’s Love

  1. Behave like a female, i.e. with all the tenderness of a female.
  2. Dress pleasantly and attractively. If you are a homemaker, don’t stay in your sleeping suit all day.
  3. Smell good.
  4. Don’t lay out all your problems on your husband as soon as he walks in. Give him a little mental break.
  5. Don’t keep asking him ‘What are you thinking?’ because, unlike women, men’s thoughts are as random as the results of a Google search. Women on the other hand have thoughts as organized as a labeled file cabinet!
  6. Stop nagging non-stop before Allah gives you something really to complain about.
  7. Absolutely no talking about your spousal problems to anyone you meet under the pretense of seeking help, even if you are the victim. If you think you want to solve legitimate marital issues then go seek counseling with the right person.
  8. Be kind to your mother-in-law the same way you would like your husband to be kind to your own mother.
  9. Learn all the rights and obligations of each other in Islam.
  10. Race to the door when he comes home as if you were waiting for him. Smile and hug.
  11. Keep your house clean, at least to the level that he wants it.
  12. Compliment him on the things you know he’s not so confident about (looks, intelligence, etc). This will build his self-esteem.
  13. Tell him he’s the best husband.
  14. Call his family often.
  15. Give him a simple task to do at home and then thank him when he does it. This will encourage him to do more.
  16. When he’s talking about something boring, listen and nod your head. Even ask questions to make it seem like you’re interested.
  17. Encourage him to do good deeds.
  18. If he’s in a bad mood, give him some space. He’ll get over it, Insha Allah.
  19. Thank him sincerely for providing you with food and shelter. It’s a big deal.
  20. If he’s angry with you and starts yelling, let him yell it out while you’re quiet. You will see your fight will end a lot faster. Then when he’s calm, you can tell him your side of the story and how you want him to change something.
  21. When you’re mad at him, don’t say ‘You make me furious,’ rather say, ‘This action makes me upset.’ Direct your anger to the action and circumstance rather than at him.
  22. Remember that your husband has feelings, so take them into consideration.
  23. Let him chill out with his friends without guilt, especially if they’re good guys. Encourage him to go out, so he doesn’t feel cooped up at home.
  24. If your husband is annoyed over a little thing you do (and you can control it), then stop doing it.
  25. Learn how to tell him what you expect without him having to guess all the time. Learn to communicate your feelings.
  26. Don’t get mad over small things. It’s not worth it.
  27. Make jokes. If you’re not naturally funny, find some jokes on the internet.
  28. Tell him you’re the best wife and compliment yourself on certain things you know you’re good at.
  29. Learn to make his favorite dish.
  30. Don’t ever, ever talk bad about him with friends or family unnecessarily.
  31. Use your time wisely and get things accomplished. If you’re a housewife, take online classes and be active in your community. This will not only make you happy but will impress your husband too.
  32. Do all of the above (i.e. trying to please your husband) for the sake of Allah and you will see Allah’s blessings in everything you do.
  33. Spouses are garments for each other; hide your husband’s faults and help him get over them wisely.
  34. Tell your husband you love him, many many times.
  35. Have a race with your husband and let him win, even if you are much fitter than him.
  36. Be fit and take care of your health; you will remain a strong mother, wife, cook, and housekeeper.
  37. Cultivate good manners. Do not be too loud, whether while laughing, talking, or even walking.
  38. Do not leave the house without his permission and certainly not without his knowledge.
  39. Make sure all his clothes are clean and pressed so they always look fresh and crisp.
  40. Ask Allah to strengthen and preserve the bonds of compassion and love between the two of you, every day in every prayer. Truly Satan’s most treasured act is to create rifts between couples to the point of divorce. Seek Allah’s refuge from Satan.
  41. They say the way to a man’s heart is through his stomach, and that’s really true.
  42. Make sure you always have something for dinner.
  43. Brush your hair every day.
  44. Don’t forget to do the laundry.
  45. Surprise him with gifts. Even necessities can be gifts, like a pair of new shoes.
  46. Listen to him when he’s talking. Don’t interject with him and talk about your own issues.
  47. Try (hard as it might be) to take an interest in his hobbies (bowling?). Try not to go shopping too much and spend all his money.
  48. Look attractive and it’s fine, in fact good, to be seductive towards him.
  49. Learn tricks and techniques to please your husband in intimacy.
  50. Prepare for special evenings with him with special dinner and exclusive time (no children permitted).
  51. Take care of your skin, especially the face, which is the center of attraction.
  52. If you are not satisfied intimately, talk to him and help him. Don’t wait till matters become worse.
  53. Never discuss important or controversial matters with him when he is tired or sleepy. Find the right time for the right discussion.
  54. Learn to compromise.
  55. Continue to do things for your husband and don’t take him for granted.
  56. Respect his rights (he’s your road to paradise).
  57. Make tea for him or whatever hot drink he likes, it will soothe his rough edges.

Husband’s Responsibility, Etiquette Towards His Wife

It is certainly not a deficiency, but rather good manners, that the husband shares responsibility in household work like mending garments or what is similar to that. The wife takes care of the household affairs. So, it is from good manners that the husband extends a helping hand to his wife in the house during times of necessity such as when she is sick, pregnant, has given birth, etc. A man should not feel shy in serving himself.

The exemplary husband is he who cooperates with his wife by keeping good relations and showing kind manners (to her). Truly, the husbands who help their wives in their work are the best of mankind in the view of Islam. This good way of living between the spouses must be deeply embedded into the daily marital life, even if the matter were to reach a divorce.

Beware of characterizing the relationship between the spouses with over-seriousness. For indeed characterizing the family life with a militaristic nature amounts to one of the causes for failure and bad results.

Among the kind and noble manners of the husband is that he complies and assents to the requests of his wife, so long as they are not forbidden in the Religion. Extravagance in food, drink, and clothing leads to the door of forbidden things in the Religion.

No human being is perfect. So no doubt the husband will see things in his wife that does not comply with his preferences. If these aspects are not in opposition to the fundaments of the Religion or to the obedience of the husband and his rights, then he should not try to change her personality to make it comply with his preferences.

He must always remember that for each one of the couple, there will be an aspect of one’s personality that conflicts with the other’s personality. The husband should always remember that if he doesn’t like some things in his wife, then indeed she will have other characteristics that are definitely pleasing to him.

Do not look for the errors of your wife and recount them to her, for too much blaming and reprimanding will worsen the relationship between the two of you, and it will pose a threat to your marital life. So overlook each other’s mistakes.

If you are able, do not hold back from providing your wife with good clothing and food, and from being generous in spending money on her. This is of course according to the extent of your ability.

Do not belittle the importance of correcting your wife if she does things that go against Religion. This should be the main, if not the only reason that should cause you to become angry.

The woman is the head of the household, the one responsible for it. So do not attempt to meddle into affairs that do not fall into your area of duties and responsibilities, such as the food and the upkeep of the house.

Beware of scolding your wife in presence of others, even if they are your own children. For indeed that is unsuitable behavior that turns the hearts of people against each other.

Having protective jealousy and caring about the modesty of your wife is a praiseworthy thing, which shows your love for her. However, it is on the condition that you do not go to great lengths in this jealousy. For then at that point, it would turn into something worthy of no praise.

Beware of divulging any secrets connected with the intimate encounters you have with your wife, for that is something restricted and forbidden.

Constantly maintain the cleaning of your mouth and the freshening of your breath.

Guardianship of your wife doesn’t mean that you can exploit what Allah has bestowed upon you from taking charge of her, such that you harm and oppress her.

Showing respect and kindness to your wife’s family is showing respect and kindness to her. And this applies even after her death.

Too much joking will lead to (your family having) little fear (of disobeying you) and a lack of respect for you. So do not joke too much and lose respect.

Fulfilling the conditions that you promised your wife in the marriage contract is very important. So do not neglect that after getting married.

When you advise her or simply talk to her, choose the kindest and nicest of words and expressions. It is not proper for you to ask your wife to look for work outside the house or to spend upon you from her wealth.

Do not overburden your wife with chores that she is not able to handle. Consider, with extreme regard, the environment she was raised up in. Working in a rural atmosphere is not like that in urban places. What a strong woman is prepared for and able to do, cannot be done by a weak woman.

Family Relationship In Islam

Islam is a complete way of life. It considers the family the cornerstone of Islamic society. It bases the atmosphere in the family on sacrifice, love, loyalty, and obedience. When we say “family” we mean the traditional definition of it, namely husband, wife and children. Grandparents are also part of the extended Muslim family.

It may be asked here: how does Islam organize family relationships? To answer this, we have to concentrate on husband-wife relationship and parent-children relationship.

As for husband wife relationship the following verse portrays the right Islamic atmosphere:

“And among His Signs is this: He created for you spouses from yourselves, that you may find rest in them, and He ordained between you affection and mercy.” (Qur-an, 30-21)

If we contemplate the Noble Qur-an, we find that it refers to parents-child relationships in four main places. Before it asks children to be good and loyal to their parents, it requires parents to be extremely careful in upbringing their children. In other words it asks parents to do their duty before asking for their rights.

These are the two main chapters of the Noble Qur-an that decide and clearly depict the Islamic relationship between parents and children. It is a relationship based, as we see, on belief in Allah, and feeling that He observes all that we do and that we are accountable to Him even in the bad breath that we may release against our parents when we are angry. Even this has to be controlled.

Let us remember, however, that it is only parents who do their duty, who deserve this honorable treatment of their children. That is why when a parent came to the Prophet (Peace Be Upon Him) and complained to him about the ingratitude of his son, the son said: He was ungrateful to me oh Messenger of Allah, before I showed ingratitude to him. So the Prophet (Peace Be Upon Him) did not blame the son but disliked the attitude of his parent. This is a message to all parents.

The third place in the Noble Qur-an that refers to parents child relationship is in chapter 46 called Al Ahqaf where Allah says:

“And We have enjoined on man to be dutiful and kind toward his parents. His mother bears him with hardship and delivers him with hardship. His bearing and weaning are thirty months, till when he attains full strength and reaches forty years, he says: ‘My Lord! Arouse me that I may give thanks for the favor where with you have favored my parents, and I may do right acceptable unto you. I have turned unto you repentant and Lo! I am one of the Muslims.”

Concerning this type of child the Noble Qur-an has the following comment: “Those are they from whom We accept the best of what they do, and We overlook their evil deeds among the dwellers of Paradise – a promise of truth, which they have been promised (in the world).”

The Noble Qur-an then turns to the other category of or children who are disbelievers and are, as a result, ungrateful to their parents. It declares:

“As for him who said to his parents: Fie upon you both! Do you threaten me that I shall be brought forth (again) when generations before me have passed away! While they too cry unto Allah for help and say: Woe unto you! Believe! Verily, the promise of Allah is true. But he says: This is nothing but fables of the ancient.”

Commenting on this attitude Allah says:

“Such are those whom the Word concerning nations of the jinn and mankind which have passed away before them has effect. Verily, they are the losers. And for each there will be degrees due to what they did; that He may recompense them in full for their deeds! And they will not be wronged.” (Qur-an, 46:15-19).

The forth and last place in the Noble Qur-an that refers to parents-child relationship is what is mentioned briefly in chapter 29 that says:

“We have enjoined on man to be good and dutiful to his parents. But should they strive to make you join with Me that of which you have no knowledge, then obey them not. Unto Me is your return and I shall tell you what you used to do.” (Qur-an, 29:8)