Muslim Parenting Guide: How to Raise Children in Islam
Providing children with Islamic education and raising them up as good practicing Muslims are essential duties of parenthood.
Rightfully fulfilling these duties will lead to the Pleasure of Allah and good for the parents and the child in this life and the Hereafter.
However, ignoring these duties would lead to the destruction of the child’s Hereafter, and the Wrath of Allah will befall the parents for not protecting their child from the traps of Shaytan and allowing him to choose the path of destruction.
Allah’s Messenger (peace and blessings be upon him) said: “Each of you is a shepherd and each of you is responsible for his flock. The leader is a shepherd and is responsible for his flock,
a man is the shepherd of his family and is responsible for his flock;
a woman is the shepherd in the house of her husband and is responsible for her flock,
the servant is the shepherd of his master’s wealth and is responsible for it.
Each of you is a shepherd and is responsible for his flock.”
[Sahih al-Bukhari and Sahih Muslim]
Allah says in the Quran: “O you who believe! Save yourselves and your family from a fire whose Fuel is men and stones.” [Noble Quran 66:6]
One way to protect your children from the Fire is to let them memorize the Words of Allah.
The Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) said: “If the Quran is gathered in a body (i.e. a person), Allah will not burn him with the Fire.” [al-Baihaqi, Authenticated by Sheikh al-Albani]
This is because the child from an early age will be protected from the temptations of the world and whispers of the Shaytan, he will live and grow up among the gathering of Dhikr (remembrance of Allah) where tranquility and the mercy of Allah descends, and as a result, Allah will preserve his Fitrah (natural inclination of Islamic Monotheism)
The Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) said: “No people gather in a house of the houses of Allah (i.e. Masjid) reciting the Book of Allah and studying it among themselves, except that the tranquility descends upon them, and Allah mentions them to those who are with Him (the lofty gathering of Angels).” [Sahih Muslim]
Your child will be given a position in Paradise according to the number of verses he memorizes from the Book of Allah, it will be said to him on the Day of Judgment as the Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) said:
“‘Read, ascend and recite with slow, rhythmic chanting just as you used to recite in the worldly life. For verily, your position (in Paradise) will be at the place of the last verse that you recite.” [Abu Dawud and at-Tirmidhi]
Every time your child goes to the Masjid to learn the Quran he will have the reward of a perfect Hajj.
The Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) said: “Whoever goes to the Masjid in the morning having no intention except to learn something good or teach it he will have the reward like the person who performs Hajj.”
[At-Tabari. Authenticated by Sheikh al-Albani]
The Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) said to Abu Dharr, “O Abu Dharr! That you set out in the morning and learn one verse from the Book of Allah is better for you than if you prayed one hundred Rakahs (units of prayer).” [Ibn Majah]
The Quran will intercede for your child on the Day of Judgment, Allah’s Messenger (peace and blessings be upon him) said: “Recite the Quran for verily it will come on the Day of Judgment as an intercessor for those who recited it.”
Your child will be given to wear garments and a crown of honor on the Day of Judgment.
The Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) said: “The Quran will come on the Day of Judgment and say, ‘Oh Lord! Adorn him.’ So the person will be made to wear the crown of honor. Then it (the Quran) will say, ‘Oh Lord! Increase him.’ So the person will be made to wear the garment of honor. Then it will say, ‘Oh Lord! Be pleased with him.’ So Allah will be pleased with him. Then it will be said, ‘Recite and ascend.’ And the person will receive an extra good deeds for every verse (that he recites of the Quran.)” [Sahih at-Tirmidhi]
The Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) said: “Whoever recites the Quran, learns it, and acts upon it will be given a crown of light to wear on the Day of Judgment and its light will be like the light of the sun.” [Sahih al-Hakim]
So, why not encourage our children to memorize the Quran and make them one of the best individuals of this Ummah.
Allah’s Messenger (peace and blessings be upon him) said: “The best of you are those who learn the Quran and teach it.” [Sahih al-Bukhari]
Allah, the Exalted, has also promised abundant rewards for those parents who guide their children to memorize the Quran.
The Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) said: “Whoever recites the Quran, learns it, and acts according to it will be given a crown of light to wear on the Day of Judgment whose light will be like the sun. His parents will be clothed in two garments that did not exist in this worldly life. So they will say, ‘What has caused us to be clothed (in these garments)?’ It will be said, ‘Your child taking hold of (i.e. memorizing) the Quran has caused this.'” [Al-Hakim graded it authentic]
When the parents leave a righteous child behind them, the child will be a source of reward and blessing for them after their death, for Allah’s Messenger (peace and blessings be upon him) said: “When a man dies, all his good deeds come to an end, except for three cases;
the charity of continuous blessings,
beneficial knowledge that he leaves behind,
and a righteous child who prays for him.” [Sahih Muslim]
The parents will also receive an equal amount of reward that the child receives by memorizing or reciting the Quran, for the parents guide him to this good act and instill in his heart the love for Islam, and the love for the Book of Allah.
The Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) said: “Whoever guides to something good is like the one who does it.” [Sahih Muslim]
“Whoever invites guidance will receive the reward like the rewards of those who follow him and that will not diminish anything from their rewards…” [Sahih Muslim]
The parents should also send those children who are intelligent and bright to learn the Quran and Islamic education.
It should not be that only those children who when are unsuccessful in worldly studies are sent to Madrasas for religious studies.
The parents should realize the importance of Islamic education for their children and raise well-educated Muslims who would in the future work for the Cause of Islam.
The Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) said: “The example of guidance and knowledge with which, Allah has sent me is like abundant rain falling on the earth, some of which was fertile soil, absorbed rain water and brought forth vegetation and grass in abundance. (And) another portion of it was hard and held the rainwater and Allah benefited the people with it and they utilized it for drinking, making their animals drink from it, and for irrigation of the land for cultivation. (And) a portion of it was barren which could neither hold the water nor bring forth vegetation (then that land gave no benefits).
The first is the example of the person who comprehends Allah’s religion and gets the benefit (from the knowledge), which Allah has revealed through me (the Prophet) and learns and then teaches others.
The last example is that of a person who does not care for it and does not take Allah’s guidance revealed through me (He is like that barren land.)” [Sahih al-Bukhari v.1 no.79]
Those parents who give the excuse that their child is weak or does not have a good memory or ‘he is not gifted’, should know that Allah has said in the Quran: “And indeed we have made the Quran easy to remember.” [Noble Quran 54:17]
And the Messenger of Allah (peace and blessings be upon him) said: “Whoever treads on a path in search of Islamic knowledge, Allah will ease the way to Paradise for him. The Angels will lower their wings, pleased with this seeker of knowledge, and everyone in the heavens and on earth will ask forgiveness for the knowledgeable person, even the fish in the deepest of waters will ask for his forgiveness.” [Sahih Abu Dawud, Ibn Majah and at-Tirmidhi (2835)]
It is not mandatory for your child to memorize the complete Quran. If he is not able to memorize the complete Quran then know that only attending daily circle for memorization will suffice for your child for it will accustom him to frequent the places of worship rather than visiting evil gatherings.
Your child will find good companions which will protect him from deviating and adopting evil habits and practices.
Allah says: “And keep yourself patiently with those who call on their Lord, morning and afternoon, seeking His Face and let not your eyes overlook them, desiring the pomp and glitter of the life of the world; and obey not him whose hearts We have made heedless of Our Remembrance, one who follows his own lust and whose affairs (deeds) have been lost.” [Noble Quran 18:28]