Raping With Your Eyes
In the name of Allah, the Most Merciful, the All-Compassionate
“May the Peace and Blessings of Allah be Upon You”
Praise be to Allah, we seek His help and His forgiveness. We seek refuge with Allah from the evil of our own souls
and our bad deeds. Whomsoever Allah guides will never be led astray, and whomsoever Allah leaves astray, no one can guide. I bear witness that there is no god but Allah, and I bear witness that Muhammad is His slave and Messenger.
Are you one of those who check out ladies on the streets, bus, train, or anywhere you see them? You check her out, and in a flash, you can tell all about her size and shape. You can also say the color of her lipstick, how her hair was styled, and what clothes she was wearing, etc., etc. Do you end up saying “wow”…
In modern Western terms, this is called: Checking her out. It’s also called: Raping with the Eyes.
Rape: The crime of forcing another person to submit to sex acts, especially sexual intercourse
But hey, we did not do anything. We did not even touch or talk to her. How could I have “raped” her with my eyes? For that, ask yourself, say…
Didn’t you look at places where you are not allowed to look at non-mehram women?
Somewhere in your mind, you had a naughty thought about her.
All said and done…. let us now look from the ladies’ point of view? Well “THEY DO NOT LIKE IT AT ALL”.
Jareer ibn Abdullaah said: “I asked the Messenger of Allah (PBUH) about an accidental glance at a woman. He commanded me to turn my gaze away.” (Reported by al-Tirmidhi, who said: This is a saheeh hasan hadeeth. See al-Sunan, 2700).
Commenting on this hadeeth, al-Mubaarakpoori said, “Accidental” means that his gaze fell on a non-mehram woman unintentionally. “He commanded me to turn my gaze away” means that we are not to look a second time, because
The first glance was not by choice and would be forgiven, but any further glances would be counted as sin, and we should heed the words of Allah (interpretation of the meaning): “Tell the believing men to lower their gaze (from looking at forbidden things)…” [al-Noor 24:30].
The Messenger of Allah (PBUH) said: “O Ali, do not follow a glance with another, for you will be forgiven for the first, but not for the second.” (Reported by al-Tirmidhi, 2701; see Saheeh al-Jaami, 7953)
And if you think that Allah SWT does not know where you were looking, and what thoughts went through your mind?
Allah says, “Allah knows the fraud of the eyes, and all that the breasts conceal.” (Surah Ghafir 40:19).
“The adultery of the eyes is the sight (to gaze at a forbidden thing), the adultery of the tongue is the talk, … and the inner self wishes and desires and the private parts testify all this or deny it.” [Sahih Al-Bukhari (no. 6612), Muslim (no. 2657), Ahmed (2/276)].
Misconception among men
We are allowed to look (meaning stare/gaze) at non-Muslim women.
We are allowed to look at the exposed parts of the ladies who have exposed themselves.
We are not allowed to look at Muslim girls & it is a sin to look (meaning to stare/gaze) at a Muslim lady wearing burkha/hijab.
But hey, even if it is a sin, it is a minor sin. The Prophet (PBUH) has said, “Beware of small sins because small sins when accumulated turn into a big fire…”
You must have all heard this hadith: Ibn Abbas narrated that the Messenger of Allah (saws) passed by two graves and said, “One of them is (getting punishment in the grave) for not cleaning himself after urine….” Related by Bukhari and Muslim.
So when the person goes through such a severe punishment for “small sins”… then you can rest assured that these so-called “small sins” (done daily) have turned into a big heap of fire.
One of the fitnahs (temptations) with which we are tested is the fitnah of women, as the Prophet (pBUH) said: “I have not left behind me any fitnah (temptation) more harmful to men than women.” What needs to be done.
1. Faith in Allah.
Faith in Allah and fear of Allah provide a safety valve and protect a person against committing haram actions and following his own whims and desires.
If the believer becomes aware that Allah is always watching and if he ponders the meanings of His names and attributes, such as the All-Knowing, the All-Hearing, the All-Seeing, the Watchful, the Reckoner, the Preserver, the All-Encompassing, that will generate fear of Him in secret and in public, and will put a stop to disobedience towards Allah, and will reduce the strength of desire that leads many people to commit haram actions.
2. Lowering the gaze and avoiding looking at haram things
The gaze can generate bad thoughts in the heart, which then lead to ideas and then to desires, then to will and resolve, and then inevitably to doing haram things. Think about the meaning of this verse, which makes a connection between the first steps towards haram and the result. Allah says (interpretation of the meaning): “Tell the believing men to lower their gaze (from looking at forbidden things), and protect their private parts (from illegal sexual acts). That is purer for them. Verily, Allah is All-Aware of what they do.” [al-Noor 24:30]
3. Warding off evil thoughts
Bad thoughts pose a danger to the heart… If a person dwells on them and does not push them away, they will develop into an idea, then into will and resolve, which will inevitably lead to haram actions. Beware of dwelling on passing thoughts; rather, what you must do is to ward them off and crowd them out with good thoughts.
The treatment, then, is to ward off these passing thoughts and keep yourself busy with beneficial thoughts.
4. Marriage
It was narrated that Abd-Allaah ibn Masood said: The Prophet (PBUH) said: “O young men, whoever among you can afford it, let him get married, and whoever cannot, let him fast, for it will be a shield for him.” Narrated by al-Bukhaari, 5065.
5. Fasting
because of the hadith quoted above, in which it says, “…and whoever cannot, let him fast, for it will be a shield for him.” Narrated by al-Bukhaari, 5065.
The less a person eats, the weaker their desire becomes, and the weaker their desire is, the fewer sins they commit.
6. Keeping away from bad companions.
The Prophet (PBUH) said: “A man will follow the way of his close friends, so let each one of you look at who he takes as a close friend.” Narrated by Abu Dawood, 8433; classed as hasan by al-Albani in Saheeh Abi Dawood, 4046.
What annoys the Shaitan the most? When the man stops looking at the girls and shows respect to his Lord.
Adil ibn Manzoor Khan with inputs by Asma bint Saeed