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What Makes A Woman Of Jannah?

“They will have whatever they wish therein (Paradise) and with Us is more” (Surah Qaf 50:35).

The woman of Jannah is one who has the following qualities:
1. She is a Muslimah: She readily, willingly, and cheerfully submits to Allah’s commands. She does not question the wisdom of the Shariah. “Men have charge over women,” says Allah. The woman of wonder does not believe in “gender equality, etc.” and does not suffer from an inferior complex, as she is fully aware that in her role as a home executive, she gains the Pleasure of Allah Ta`ala.

2. She is a Mu’minah: Filled with Iman from head to toe, her faith is unshakable. Her quest and mission in life: to perfect her Iman and serve her husband.

3. She is Contented: The woman of Jannah is more than contented with her lot. She craves not an iota nor a drop of the Dunya. She does not waste her time roaming in malls, etc., as this does not enthrall her.

4. She is Truthful: Truthfulness is her trademark. In intention, in speech and deed, the woman of wonder is truthful to Allah and His Rasul (Sallallahu alayhi Wasallam). She is loyal to her husband. She detests falsehood, hypocrisy, and pretence.

5. She has Sabr: The woman of Jannah is a mountain of Sabr. She has accepted Sabr as her lot, since her desire is to enter Jannah. Sabr with her husband, Sabr with in-laws, Sabr with children, Sabr in overseeing the affairs of her home. Sabr, yes, Sabr – lots and lots of it.

Unnecessary Obstacles To marriage

Young women have many hopes and dreams. Among the most important of these dreams focus upon their future husbands, the men who are going to be their partners through the long and arduous journey of life. Some girls want their husbands to be young and handsome. Others prefer men who are gentle and romantic. Still, others want their husbands to be rich or famous.

These dreams are sometimes beset by obstacles that prevent the young woman from ever realizing them, obstacles to marriage that are uncalled for and unnecessary. Among the most important of these are the following:

1. Studies: This can take many years, depending on the program of study undertaken and the desired degree goals. In truth, a woman’s marriage is not incompatible with her furthering her studies. What it needs is for there to be an understanding from the onset between the husband and wife about the matter of her studies.

I see this as part of facing up to our changing circumstances. There are many destructive influences that beset our young men and women today. The mass media has an overwhelming effect. The world is more open. Early marriage has become more of a necessity for our young men and women than it has ever been before. It needs to be given priority. A young woman should give the matter her attention, as should her parents.

2. The father: A father may turn away prospective suitors for his daughters for many reasons. These reasons might be financial or cultural. Sometimes the father insists that his daughter marry one of her cousins or no one else.

Consider the following examples:

• A woman over 30 years of age complains that her father has a distorted sense of his own greatness and sees himself as a man of considerable importance and status. He refuses to marry his daughter to anyone except a man who satisfies his standards. Such a man will never come.

• A university graduate who works and is obliged to give her monthly salary over to her father in full is prevented by her father from ever marrying for reasons that are obvious.

A father prohibiting his daughter from marriage is a terrible crime that makes the skin crawl. Even if the father’s faith is weak and he is not God-fearing, we would think that he would have some humanity or mercy in his heart. We find more mercy exhibited by wild animals for their children. While this father sleeps comfortably in his room with his wife at his side, his grown-up daughters are tossing and turning restlessly in their beds, because they are being denied the greatest of physical blessings that Allah has placed within us the drive to seek out.

Allah is speaking to every believer when He says: “…do not prevent them from marrying their husbands, if they mutually agree on reasonable basis. This (instruction) is an admonition for him among you who believes in Allah and the Last Day. That is more virtuous and purer for you. Allah knows and you know not.” (Qur’an, 2:232)

So where are those who believe in Allah and the Last Day?
Preventing one’s daughters from marrying suitable men with whom they are pleased is a serious form of oppression. Friends and relatives need to intervene in order to help those women and free them from their confinement. If this does not happen, then the courts need to intervene. Social and governmental agencies should be mobilized to protect women who are being prevented from marriage and confront the transgression of those fathers.

It is true that most fathers are merciful and feel compassion for their daughters and it is allowed for them to prevent their daughters from marrying certain suitors when they have a valid reason to do so. However, there are situations – though they may be few in number, they are seriously painful for the women involved – where outside intervention is needed. In many cases, the daughter will be unable to speak up in her own defense or voice a complaint.

This is because she fears destroying her relationship with her father or fears that her reputation will be tarnished. She might not have any opportunity to leave home in the first place or to speak to anyone who can air her grievances on her behalf. In this way, she can spend her whole life and waste her youth in bitter waiting.

3. The man: The young man who wishes to get married wants a beautiful wife, and beauty to him is what his eyes have grown accustomed to seeing in the movies and on television. He wants her to be fair in complexion, tall, and young. He wants her to have the beauty of a fashion model, the piety of the Prophet’s Companions, and the wealth of a tycoon, without him having to exert any effort on his part. He needs to come down to earth.

This may be one of the negative effects of constantly watching movies and programs that cause our young people to live in a fantasy world that has no connection whatsoever with reality. Even if a young man lowers his unrealistic standards, he remains in distress and this puts a strain on his future relationship with his wife.

Allah tells us: “O you who believe! Follow not Satan’s footsteps: if any will follow the footsteps of Satan, he will (but) command what is shameful and wrong.” (Qur’an, 24:21)

4. Exuberant costs: Heavy expenditures for marriage as well as numerous and excessive material demands place a great burden upon the shoulders of young men, forcing them to turn away from the prospect of marriage.

The postponement of marriage is a hindrance that everyone must work together to solve. It has to be addressed publicly by scholars, orators, intellectuals, public figures, and reformers. The means to marriage need to be simplified. Institutions need to be established to facilitate marriages materially, socially, and on a personal level.

By Sheikh Salman Al-Oadah – Islam Today

Showcasing The Shyness Of A Shepherdess

Allah mentions good people in the Qur’an and highlights their good points when He is pleased with them so that we indirectly identify the stamp of approval He has given in order to incorporate that behavior in our own actions.

In the following incident from the life of Prophet Musa, Allah describes a shy young woman’s praiseworthy demeanor. The verses quoted are from Surah Al-Qasas (28: 23-28) and the explanation is from Ibn Kathir’s Tafsir.

“And when he arrived at the water (a well) of Madyan,” which means when he reached Madyan and went to drink from its water, “for it had a well where shepherds used to water their flocks,” meaning he found there a group of men watering, “and besides them, he found two women who were keeping back,” which means, they were stopping their sheep from drinking with the sheep of those shepherds, lest some harm comes to them. When Musa saw them, he felt sorry for them and took pity on them.

“He said: “What is the matter with you?” meaning, ‘why do you not water your flocks with these people?’

“They both said: “We cannot water until the shepherds take…” meaning, `we cannot water our flocks until they finish.’

“And our father is a very old man,” which means, “this is what has driven us to what you see.”

“So he watered (their flocks) for them, then he turned back to shade, and said: ‘My Lord! Truly, I am in need of whatever good that You bestow on me!”’

“Towards the shade,” Ibn Abbas, Ibn Mas`ud, and As-Suddi said: “He sat beneath a tree.”
Ata’ Bin As-Sa’ib said: “When Musa said: ‘My Lord! Truly, I am in need of whatever good that You bestow on me!’ the women heard him.”

When the two women came back quickly with the sheep, their father was surprised that they returned so soon. He asked them what had happened, and they told him what Musa had done. So he sent one of them to call him to meet her father. Allah says:

“Then there came to him one of them, walking shyly” – meaning, she was walking like a free woman, as it was narrated from Umar Bin Al-Khattab: “She was covering herself from him with the folds of her garment.”

Umar said: “She came walking shyly, putting her garment over her face. She was not one of those audacious women who come and go as they please.” This chain of narrators is Sahih.

“She said: ‘Verily, my father calls you that he may reward you for having watered (our flocks) for us.’”

This is an example of good manners: She did not invite him directly lest he has some suspicious thoughts about her. Rather she said: “My father is inviting you so that he may reward you for watering our sheep,” i.e., give you some payment for that.

Imam Sa’di says in his Tafsir, “This (description) points to her proper upbringing and her good character, for indeed Haya is from the most honorable of manners, and is a special trait in women. It also shows that Musa did not assist them to receive payment; but rather, it was because of the honorable and strong nature of his soul and his upright manners.”

“So when he came to him (the father) and narrated the story,” means, he told (the father) about his story and why he had to leave his country.

“He said: ‘Fear you not. You have escaped from the people who are wrongdoers.’”

“And said one of them: ‘O my father! Hire him! Verily, the best of men for you to hire is the strong, the trustworthy.’” One of the two daughters of the man said this, and it was said that she was the one who had walked behind Musa.

Umar, Ibn Abbas, Shurayh Al-Qadi, Abu Malik, Qatadah, Muhammad Bin Ishaq, and others narrated that her father asked her, “What do you know about that?” She replied, “He lifted a rock which could only be lifted by 10 men, and when I came back with him, I walked ahead of him, but he said to me, walk behind me, and if I get confused about the route, throw a pebble so that I will know which way to go.”

Who Should Have Right To Divorce?

One of the objections raised against the Islamic Law of divorce or Talaq is that in empowering man to divorce, Islam has been harsh and unjust to the woman. While pondering over the issue, three alternative answers come to the query: who should be given the right to divorce? The first option is that both should have this right. The second is that the husband should be so empowered. And the third option could be that the wife should have this right.

In the first instance, if both have the right to divorce, the multiplicity of divorces shall make family life uncertain and insecure. In the case of both exercising this right, there will obviously be a much larger number of “casualties” than with only one armed with this weapon to sever relations.

The second option is that adopted by Islam, which has vested this power in man for the reason that he enjoys a little more dignified position in the family. He is the supervisor of the family, maintainer of the wife and with that bears the heavy burden of children’s upkeep, education, and upbringing.

Therefore, it is he who should decide whether it is possible to bear the burden of these responsibilities in collaboration with the wife or not? In the Qur’anic terminology “in his hands has been placed the power to tie the marriage knot (contract) or untie it.” It would be harsh and unjust to compel him to go on maintaining a woman as the queen of the mini-realm, home, whom he does not like or whose cooperation has been denied to him.

Taking the third option in which the wife will have the right to divorce, it is apparent that in this event the abuse of the right cannot be eliminated. In according the right to the wife, there are some evils associated with it also:

· It would be a grave injustice to man to make him bear all the responsibilities toward the woman (dower, gifts, maintenance, and the like) and to grant the right to divorce to the woman.

· Divorce is damaging to a man entirely, whereas the woman remains immune from any harm. If the right is granted to her, a morally irresponsible wife, whenever she chooses, she shall divorce the husband, and handing over children to him, she will take leave of him with the “booty” of her dower and jewelry and gifts in full triumph, and at the first chance coming her way, she will marry another man getting fresh dower and other privileges.

· It is an obvious fact that woman is much more sentimental than man and can at any time, under the impulse of the moment, sever relations with man. That will go a long way in increasing the rate of divorce under normal conditions, thus confronting society with a new crisis.

The way Islam shapes the mind and temperament of man and educates and trains him, divorce can hardly find room in his life and the lurking fear that merely for sexual enjoyment and gratification of abnormal lust he will go on divorcing women most carelessly is only a remote possibility.

Sayyid Jalaluddin Umri, currently President, India’s Jamaat-e-Islami, is an eminent theologian and scholar of Islamic jurisprudence.

 

Woman – the Concealed Jewel

It is to you, the founder of generations, and producer of great men. I will point out in it some of what Islam requires of the individual and the society concerning the rights of women.

1) Have you seen the jewel? Why is it that the people love it while it is simply a piece of art? It is because it is not so easy to see it, nor can you touch it. Similar is the case of the woman – it is forbidden for a man to see her or touch her, in order that he does not dishonor her. She is like an untouched (pure) jewel, which is affected by the least touch.

2) Have you seen how a rose wilts, withers, and loses its luster and beauty if it is touched too much.
Likewise, the woman is not allowed to be touched except by one in a lawful relationship of marriage. And whoever attempts to touch her – unlawfully – will earn a severe punishment or death.

3) Do you know the punishment for one who violates the marriage trust and betrays his wife? The penalty is death since he has fallen short in regards to the jewel which is with him, in addition to transgressing the rights of others.

4) Have you seen a jewel searching for a person (to possess it)? The same is the case of the woman, like a precious jewel, she is the one who is sought out, not the seeker.
It is incumbent upon the man to seek her hand. And if she agrees to marry him, then he will present to her a marriage dowry and something from his wealth.

5) Allah has created the male strong of the body in order that he may go out and earn his livelihood, even in difficult circumstances. This is so that he may serve the women and children of his family.

As for the woman, she has been created gentle, soft and sensitive, so that she may cultivate the future generations. The man goes out and works with the natural elements, while the woman deals with the human beings (raising the children).

6) The woman is allowed to work in any occupation, which she is capable of, as long as it is in consonance with the nature of her delicate physique.

7) The woman – like man – is addressed in the divine revelation with responsibilities for which she – like a man – is equally rewarded.

8) The woman is excused from certain religious observances and obligations during her post-childbirth and menstrual periods since these conditions are a cause of weakness and hence, she is in need of rest and relaxation.

9) The person who is killed while defending his mother, wife, daughter, or sister will be rewarded with the highest station in Paradise.

10) It is permissible for a woman to seek a separation from her husband if he fails to fulfill her marital rights.

11) It is permissible for the woman to remarry – whomever she desires – if he is divorced from her husband or widowed.

12) If a woman possesses wealth, she is free to use it in any lawful way, without permission of anyone (father, husband, or others.)

13) The woman has the right to the inheritance of her relatives – at the time of his death – even if he does not desire that she receive it.

14) It is obligatory upon the man to spend his wealth for the maintenance – housing, food, etc. – of those under his care including his mother, wife, or daughter, even if he doesn’t desire to do so.

15) The mother has been given preference over the father – three times over – concerning their right to kindness and benevolence from their children.

16) Whoever has daughters and treats them well – they will be a cause of him being screened from the Hellfire.

17) The Messenger of Allah (peace be upon him) advised concerning the woman: Treat the women well. He also said: The best of you are those who are the best in the treatment of their wives.
He also said: No one honors the woman except an honorable man. And no one humiliates her or holds her in contempt except one who is evil, vile, wicked, and depraved.

The Wives of the People of Paradise

The Delights of the People of Paradise:

(i) The Wife Of The Believer In This World Will Be His Wife In The Hereafter If She Is Righteous

“Gardens of ‘Adn, which they shall enter, and [also] those who act righteously from among their fathers, and their wives and their offspring…” [13:23]

“They and their wives will be in pleasant shade, reclining on thrones.” [36:56]

“Enter Paradise, you and your wives, in happiness” [43:70]

(ii) A Woman [Who Was Married More Than Once] Will Be With The Last of Her Husbands

In Taareekh ar-Raqqah, Abu ‘Ali al-Hurani reported from Maymun ibn Mahran that “Mu’aawiyah ibn Abi Sufyan (ra) proposed to Umm ad-Darda’ but she refused to marry him, saying, “I heard Abud-Dardaa’ say that the Messenger of Allah (saw) said, “A woman will be with the last of her husbands.” The men in its isnaad are trustworthy apart from al-‘Abbaas ibn Saalih, whose biography is unknown. Abul-Shaykh reported it in at-Taareek with a Saheeh isnaad only quoting the marfoo’ version of it. at-Tabaraani reported it with a da’eef  isnaad in al-Mu’jam al-Awsat but taking both isnaads into account strengthens it. The marfoo’ version is Saheeh, and it also has two corroborating reports that are mawqoof.

The first of these was reported by Ibn ‘Asaakir from ‘Ikrimah:

“Asmaa bint Abi Bakr was married to az-Zubayr ibn al-‘Awwaam who was harsh towards her. She came to her father and complained to him, and he said, “O my daughter, have patience, for if a woman has a righteous husband, and he dies and she does not remarry after his death, they will be reunited in Paradise.” [The men of its isnaad are thiqaat [trustworthy] but is it mursaal because ‘Ikrimah never met Abu Bakr; he only heard it from Asmaa]

The second report was narrated by al-Bayhaqee in as-Sunan, where he says that Hudhayfah said to his wife, “If you want to be my wife in Paradise, do not remarry after I die, for the woman in Paradise will be with the last of her husbands on earth.”

For this reason, Allah forbade the wives of the Prophet (saw) to remarry after his death, because they will be his wives in the Hereafter.

(iii) al-Hoor al-‘Eeyn

Allah (swt) will marry the believers in Paradise to beautiful women who were not their wives in this world, as Allah (swt) says:

“So [it will be] and We shall marry them to Houris with wide lovely eyes.” [44:54]

al-Hoor is the plural of Hooraa’, which is a woman, the white parts of her eyes intensely white, and the black is intensely black. al-‘Eeyn is the plural fo ‘Aynaa, which is the woman whose eyes are wide.

The Qur’an describes al-Hoor al-‘Eeyn as being firm and full-breasted:

“Verily, for al-Muttaqoon, there will be a success; gardens and grape yards and young full-breasted [mature] maidens of equal age.” [78:31-33]

Al-Hoor al-‘Eeyn are creatures that Allah (swt) has made especially for Paradise, and has made them virgins:

“Verily, We have created [their companions] of special creation, and made them virgin-pure [and undefiled], beloved [by nature], equal in age.” [56:35-37]

The fact that they are virgins means that no-one has ever married them before:

“…whom no man or jinn has touched before them.” [55:56]

This refutes the idea that the wives that Allah (swt) will create for them in Paradise will be their wives from this life, made young again after old age had overtaken them. That idea if correct in that Allah (swt) will admit the believing women to Paradise with their youth restored but they are not al-Hoor al-‘Eeyn whom Allah created in Paradise.

The Qur’an also speaks of the beauty of the women of al-Jannah:

“And [there will be] Houris with wide lovely eyes [as wives for the pious], Like unto preserved pearls.” [56:22-23]

Maknoon [“preserved”] means hidden or protected, something whose colour is not changed by exposure to sunlight or by being tampered with. Elsewhere, Allah likens them to rubies and coral, two beautiful precious stones:

“In them will be [maidens] restraining their glances, whom no man or jinn has touched before them, Then which of the favours of your Rabb will you deny? Like unto rubies and coral.” [55:56-58]

al-Hoor are also described as restraining their gaze upon their husbands i.e. they restrict their gaze and don’t let their eyes wander to others. Allah (swt) has stated that they are very beautiful, and it is sufficient to know that Allah (swt) said:

“In them will be fair [companions] good and beautiful; then which of the favours of your Rabb will you deny? Companions restrained [as to their glances] in [goodly] pavilions” [55:70-72]

The women are not like the women of this world. They are free of al-Hayd [menstruation], an-Nifaas [post-natal bleeding], spittle, mucus, urine and stools. This is what is referred to in the aayah:

“..And they shall have therein Azwaajun Mutahharatun [purified mates]” [2:25]

The Prophet (saw) told us about the beauty of the wives of the People of Paradise. al-Bukhaari and Muslim reported from Abu Hurayrah that the Messenger (saw) said, “…the marrow of whose leg-bones will be visible through the flesh because of their extreme beauty.” [as-Saheeh, Kitaab al-Khalq, Baab Maa Jaa’a fi Sifaat al-Jannah, Fath al-Baari, 6/318 and Muslim in Kitaab al-Jannah wa Sifaat Na’eem ahlilhaa, Baab awwal zumrah tadkhul al-Jannah, 4/2178, no. 2834]

Look at this beauty that the Prophet (saw) described! Can you find any comparison to it in the world that you know?! :

“If one of the women of Paradise were to look at the people of this world, everything in between them would be lit up and filled with her fragrance. The veil on her head is better than this world and everything in it.” [al-Bukhaari, in as-Saheeh, Kitaab al-Jihaad, Baab wa Zawwajnahum bi Hoor-‘Eeyn. Fath al-Baari, 6/15]

The smallest number of wives that any one man will have in Paradise is seventy-two. It was reported that the Shaheed will have seventy-two wives from amongst al-Hoor a–‘Eeyn [Mishkaat al-Masaabeeh, 3/357, no. 3834, at-Tirmidhi, Ibn Maajah from al-Miqdaam ibn Ma’d Yakrib]

The Song of al-Hoor al-‘Eeyn
The Messenger (saw) told us that al-Hoor in Jannah sing with sweet, beautiful voices. In al-Mu’jam al-Awsat, at-Tabaraani reports with a saheeh isnaad from Ibn ‘Umar that the Prophet (saw) said,

“The wives of the people of Paradise will sing to their husband in the most beautiful voices that anyone has ever heard. What they will sing is: “We are good and beautiful, the wives of a noble people, who look at their husbands content and happy.” And they will sing, “We are eternal, and will never die, we are safe and will never fear, we are remaining here and will never go away.” [Saheeh al-Jaami as-Sagheer, 2/48, no. 1557; also Abu Na’eem, ad-Diyaa in Sifaat al-Jannah]

Samawayh reported in al-Fawaa’id from Anas that the Messenger of Allah (saw) said, “al-Hoor al-‘Eeyn are singing in Paradise saying, “We are the beautiful houris, we are being kept for noble husbands.” [Saheeh al-Jaami’, 2/58, no. 1598]

The Jealousy of al-Hoor al-Eeyn over their Husbands in this World

The Prophet (saw) told us that al-Hoor feel jealous over their husbands in this world if the wife of one of them upsets him. Ahmad and at-Tirmidhi report with a Saheeh isnaad from Mu’aadh that the Messenger of Allah (saw) said,

“No woman in this world upsets her husband but his wife from among al-Hoor al-‘Eeyn will say, “Do not upset him, may Allah kill you! For he is with you only temporarily, and soon he will leave you and come to us.” [Saheeh al-Jaami’ as-Sagheer, 6/125, no. 7069]

(iv) The believer in Paradise will be given the Strength of One Hundred Men
Anas reported that the Prophet (saw) said, “The believer in Paradise will be given such and such strength.” He was asked, “O Messenger of Allah, will he really be able to do that?” He said, “He will be given the strength of one hundred men.” [it was reported by at-Tirmidhi, Mishkaat al-Masaabeeh, 3/90, no. 5636, at-Tirmidhi said: “ghareeb saheeh.”]

A Mistake Worth Its Weight In Gold

From the Original Arabic Piece by Adel bin Muhammad al-Abdul ‘Aalee
Translated by Abu Dujanah

One of the Salaf entered a field, hungry and tired, so he wanted to eat, and his stomach was ‘rumbling’. He saw an apple tree, and picked an apple to eat. He ate half of it under the protection of Allah, then he drank from the river near the field. After that, he suddenly realised that he was not aware of what he did due to his hunger, and thought to himself: Woe to you! How can you eat someone else’s provision without permission. In remorse he was determined not to leave the place until he found the owner of the garden, and confess to him that he had eaten his provision without his permission. He looked around and saw a house and went up to the door and knocked on it.
The owner came out and asked him what he wanted.

The Salaf said: “I was hungry and entered your garden and took this apple and ate half of it, then I remembered it was not mine, and I came to beg you to forgive me for this mistake.”
The man replied, “I will not forgive you except on one condition?”
So the Salaf asked (and he is Thaabit bin Nu’maan), “What is your condition?”
The owner of the garden said: “I want you to marry my daughter.”
The honourable Salaf without hesitation said: “yes, I will marry her”. The father of the girl then said: “I want you to know that my daughter is blind and cannot see, dumb and cannot speak, deaf and cannot hear.”

The revelation shocked Thaabit bin Nu’maan and thoughts flashed through his mind – what a disaster – what’s he going to do? Then he remembered that the trials and tribulation he has to endure by accepting this woman as his wife, and taking care of her and serving her is better for him than to eat the food (sadeed) of hellfire due to the fact that he had eaten the apple without permission. He also realized that if he did not make amends, his days in the dunya are numbered. So he promised to marry the girl, and prayed for forgiveness and reward from Allah, the Lord of the Worlds.

The day of marriage came, and the man was nervous and very worried: “How will I enter upon a woman who does not speak, see, or hear?!” What a dilemma, and he wished the earth would swallow him before that happened (i.e. going the wedding ceremony), but he remembered Allah Subhanahu wa Ta’ala and said: “Laa Hawla wa laa quwata illa billah, wa inna lilah wa inna ilayhi raji’oon.” He went off to the wedding ceremony and when he arrived, his future bride stood up and greeted him, saying, “Assalamu ‘alaykum wa rahmatullahi wa barakatuhu.”

When he saw her, it took his breath away and remembered what he had imagined of the hoor il-‘ayn in paradise. Gaining his composure, he blurted out: “What is this? So you speak, see, and hear.” Thaabit bin Nu’maan then informed her what her father had to told him.

She gave him the most beautiful smile and said: “My father spoke the truth and he didn’t lie.”

“But why did he tell me things about you which are untrue?
She replied, “My father said I am dumb, because I have never said a word which displeases Allah, nor have I ever spoken to a man whom it is not permissable to speak to. [He said] I am deaf, because I have never sat it in a place where malicious backbiting, gossip or tale-telling takes place. [He said] I am blind because I have never looked at a man who was not permissable for me to look.”

So ponder how Allah Subhanahu wa Ta’ala united this pious woman to this pious man.!

The Islamic Wife In The Light Of Holy Qur’an And Ahadees

The Holy Prophet (S.A.W.) said, “A thankful tongue, a soft-hearted wife is a friend of yours in religion.” These are the qualities that Islam desires in a woman who shall nurture the future generations of mankind towards an Islamic society.

Sociologists all over the world are laying more and more stress on the importance of family life, as opposed to what goes on in the West, where 5 out of 10 marriages end in divorce, where 60% of divorced women are prone to suicide, and almost every separated family has a history of a delinquent child.

As a maintainer of woman, the man has been deemed responsible for managing the day-to-day affairs outside the house, striving to earn, a livelihood. Woman has been given complete charge of the house, responsible for rearing the children and managing the home. This division of management is not in any way derogatory to the honor of woman; she is not the man’s slave, but his equal. In all its wisdom, Islam has allotted different sets of duties to men and women because of their different physical and mental attributes. Man is physically better suited to rough it out in the harsh world, and, due to her physical and emotional make up, woman is more suitable to manage the house.

A woman is more self-sufficient in household affairs and better shoulders the responsibility of rearing the children. This arrangement guarantees the continuation and the formation of a society complementing religion. This is a great trial and test for man and woman. Very rarely do we find a family like that of Imam Ali (A.S.), which contains a Fatima Zahra (S.A.), Hassan (A.S.), Hussain (A.S.), Zainab (S.A.) and Kulsum (S.A.).

The Holy Qur’an states: “They (wives) are an apparel for you, and you are an apparel for them.” (2:187)

What the Qur’an is stating is clear – besides covering the body, apparel protects the body from the vagaries of nature, enhancing one’s personal beauty. Man and wife should complement each other, and as Imam Ali (A.S.) has said, “Like a dress, a worthy wife will conceal one’s fault.”

Umm Salamah – A Woman Of Character

Umm Salamah, a widow, was a woman who combined beauty with character, noble birth and a wealth of experience. Her deceased husband was one of the early converts to the new faith when Prophet Muhammad (peace be upon him) began preaching his message in secret. Being a woman of sagacious mind, she joined him in declaring her belief in Islam, realizing that idolatry is an absurdity, which defies human logic. Her father was a man who earned great honor in his own right. He was given the nickname Zad Al-Rakb, which means the “provider for all travelers.” When he went on a trip, he would not allow anyone who joined his caravan to take any food with him. He provided all the food necessary for them all. His generosity and hospitality was of the highest order.

Such a woman would not stay unmarried for long. The fact that she had four children, one of them was still newly born, was no hindrance in the Arabian society, which accepted polygamy as normal. Hence, when her waiting period of four months and ten days was over, a succession of suitors sent their proposals. These included Abu Bakr and Umar, but Umm Salamah, or Hind, to use her original name, politely and gently rejected them all. She had lost a husband of great character, whom she dearly loved.

She reports that her husband had told her of a Hadith he heard the Prophet stating: “Whoever meets a misfortune should resort to what God has ordered in such cases, saying, ‘We all belong to God and to Him we all return. My Lord! Grant me support in my misfortune and compensate me with something better.’ If he does so, God will certainly give him support and is sure to give him better compensation.” Continuing her report, she said: “When my husband died, I frequently said this prayer. Then I thought who could be better for me than Abu Salamah? Yet I hoped that God would give me support to bear my loss.” (Related by Muslim).

A different report mentions that before his death, her husband said this prayer: “My Lord! When I have died, give Umm Salamah a man who is better than me, who would take care of her and give her nothing to upset her or cause her grief.” When her husband died she wondered who could be better than him.

Yet this is exactly what happened to Hind bint Abu Umayyah ibn Al-Mugheerah, who is better known as Umm Salamah. After rejecting a succession of suitors, she received an offer of marriage no Muslim woman could refuse. It was the Prophet who wanted her to join his household as a new wife. Recognizing the great honor such a marriage would give her, she was delighted. Yet at the same time she felt reluctant. She sent him word saying: “I am too jealous, and old, and I am mother of several children.” It was an answer that meant no refusal, but provided grounds for the Prophet not to proceed with his proposal. The Prophet sent her a kind reply saying: “God may take away your jealousy. As for your age, I am older than you. And you may entrust your children to God and His messenger.”

Who could take better care of any widow’s children than God? Who could be a better stepfather than God’s messenger? Hence, the marriage was soon celebrated and Umm Salamah realized that God had compensated her with a husband who was much better than her first husband, great indeed as Abu Salamah was.

– By Adil Salahi