Showing Disrespect to One’s Parents (Part 2)
Showing Disrespect to One’s Parents (Part 1)
Once Ibn ‘Umar (may Allah be pleased with him) saw a man bearing his mother upon his shoulder and making circumambulation around the Ka’ba. The man asked him, “Do you think that I requite her? No, not even with a cry from childbirth. But well done. Allah will give you in return for a little deed a great reward.” (Reported by AI-Bukhari)
Abu Hurairah (may Allah be pleased with him) related that the Prophet (peace be upon him) said, “There are four people who will not enter Paradise as Allah decreed: a drunkard, a usurer, he who appropriates the orphan’s property without a legal cause, and he who shows disrespect to one’s parents.” (Reported by AI-Hakim)
The Messenger of Allah (peace be upon him) said, “Paradise lies beneath the feet of mothers.” (It has numerous references.)
A man came to Abu Ad-Darda’ (may Allah be pleased with him) and said, “O Abu Ad-Darda’ (may Allah be pleased with him), I have married a woman, but my mother ordered me to divorce her. ” Then Abu Ad-Darda’ (may Allah be pleased with him) said, “Parents are the middle gate of Paradise. You may either miss or preserve it.” (Reported by Ibn Majah, Ahmad, and AI-Hakim)
The Messenger of Allah (peace be upon him) said, “Three supplications are surely acceptable: the supplication of the oppressed, the traveler, and the parents against their children.” (Reported by At-Tirmidhi, Abu Dawud, and Ibn Majah)
“An aunt is treated as a mother, i.e., honorable treatment.” (Reported by AI-Bukhari and Abu Dawud)
Wahb Ibn Munabbih said, “In the tablets written by Allah to Musa is the following: ‘O Musa! Respect your parents. Whoever respects his parents, I will extend his lifespan and grant him a grateful progeny. But whoever shows disrespect to his parents, I will shorten his lifespan and grant him an ungrateful progeny.” (As-Sini postulated it in Ad-Dur AI-Manthur)
Abu Bakr Ibn Abu Mariam also said, “I read in the Torah that he who hits his father will be killed.” Similarly, Wahb said, “I read in the Torah that he who slaps his father should be stoned until death.”
Amr Ibn Murrah Al-Juhanni said, “A man came to the Messenger of Allah and asked, ‘O Messenger of
Allah (peace be upon him), what do you say if I pray obligatory duties, fast during Ramadan, give due Zakat on my wealth, and perform Hajj if I am able to do so, what is my reward?’ The Messenger of Allah (peace be upon him) said, ‘He who does this, he will be with the prophets, truthful people, and the martyrs unless he disrespects his parents.” (Reported by AI-Haithami in Majma’ AI-Zawa’id)
It was related that the Messenger of Allah (peace be upon him) said, “May Allah curse he who shows disrespect to
his parents.”
It was narrated. Also, the Messenger of Allah (peace be upon him) said, “In the night of Isra’ (Night Journey), I saw groups of people in the Hell-Fire hanged on trunks of fire. I asked, ‘Who are they, Gabriel?'” He said, “They are those who revile their parents in this world.”
Bishr said, “Whoever is intimate with his mother and listens to her speech is better than the one who fights with his sword in the cause of Allah. Gazing at her surpasses everything. Once, a man and a woman presented before the Prophet (peace be upon him) arguing about their child. The man said, “O Messenger of Allah (peace be upon him), he is my child who was created from my loins (backbone).” On the other hand, the woman said, “O Messenger
of Allah (peace be upon him), he bore him lightly and proceeded with it out of lust. But I bore him in travail, delivered him in travail, and suckled him during two full years. “Thereupon, the Prophet judged for the mother.” (There is no hadith similar to this statement.)
In the Prophet’s lifetime, there was a young man called Alqamah. He was so devout that he exerted great efforts in performing many prayers, fasting, and spending money in charity. He had a fatal disease, and his wife informed the Prophet (peace be upon him) that her husband was dying. Thereby, the Prophet (peace be upon him) sent Ammar, Suhaib, and Bilal to instruct the dying man to say the testimony of faith. When they arrived there, they found him dying. Therefore, they began to instruct him to say, “There is no god but Allah,” but he could not repeat it. They returned to the Prophet (peace be upon him) to consult him. Then, the Prophet (peace be upon him) said, “Did he have living parents?” They said, “He had an aged mother.” Accordingly, the Prophet asked them to bring her if she was able to walk. Otherwise, he himself would go there. When being informed of the Prophet’s message, the mother said, “I sacrifice him with my soul. I will go to him.” She then went to him, leaning on a staff. After greeting, the Prophet (peace be upon him) said, “O mother of Alqamah, tell me the truth, and if you lie, Allah will reveal the truth to me. How was Alqamah?” She said, “He performed many prayers, fasted, and spent money in charity.” Then, the Prophet (peace be upon him) asked, “What about you?” She said, “O Messenger of Allah! I am angry with him.” The Prophet asked, “Why?” She said, “Because he prefers his wife to me and also disobeys me.” Then, the Prophet (peace be upon him) said, “The anger of Alqamah’s other holds Alqamah’s tongue to utter the testimony of faith.”
Afterwards, the Prophet said, O Bilal, go and gather a pile of wood. “The woman said, ‘Why, Messenger of Allah?” The Prophet said, “To burn him before your eyes.” She said, “O Messenger of Allah (peace be upon him), he is my son! I cannot endure that he be burnt before my eyes.” Then, the Prophet (peace be upon him) said, “But Allah’s torture is more severe and lasting, mother of Alqamah. So if you like him to be forgiven by Allah, you forgive him. By Whom in Whose Hands my Soul Is, what he performed of prayers, fasting, and charity is of no avail so long as you are angry with him.”
Then, she said, “O Messenger of Allah (peace be upon him), may Allah the Almighty, his angels, and all Muslims who are present witness that I forgive my son, Alqamah.” Thereupon, the Prophet (peace be upon him) said, “Go to him, Bilal, to see whether he can utter the testification of faith or not.? She might forgive him out of shyness.” Approaching Alqamah’s house, Bilal heard him saying, “There is no god but Allah.” Then, the Prophet (peace be upon him) ordered them to prepare the funeral, washing, and shroud. Then, he prayed over him and witnessed the funeral. Then, the Prophet stood in front of the deceased’s grave and said, “O Muhajirin (Emigrants), O Ansar (Helpers), he who prefers his wife to his mother entails the curse of Allah, His angels, and the whole people. Allah never accepts his deeds or a reason unless he makes repentance, treats his mother well, and asks for her consent. This is because Allah’s consent is conditioned on the mother’s, and His wrath is hers.” (Reported by Ibn Hajar AI-Haithami)
by Imam Shamsu ed-Deen Dhahabi