Accept that no person is perfect; all have some faults; focus on own faults; not next person’s faults; do not look for faults or highlight next person’s faults all the time.
- There is no such thing as a perfect marriage; all marriages have some problem or the other, till the end; this is a test for Insan in this world
- Always focus on the positive points/aspects of the marriage and one’s partner
- My partner has been ordained for me by My Creator; so no point in finding fault with His decree
- Realize that Allah made all different – temperament, habits, background – yet all have to live together; this is the challenge of marriage
- Realize that Allah has made man & woman different; man is to be the kind and compassionate protector of woman, not her tormentor
- Each partner must try to fulfill the rights of the other and forgo their own rights; not fight for and demand rights
- Accept that no person is perfect; all have some faults; focus on own faults; not the next person’s faults; do not look for faults or highlight next person’s faults all the time
- Never try to be a perfectionist in marriage issues
- Make a firm commitment to make marriage work; affirm this by word and deed; do not say or do things that may damage the marriage
- Be considerate of one’s partner; be sensitive to one’s partner; do not hurt feelings
- Appreciate each other; express it now and then; do not take next person or favors for granted
- Always be objective, not emotional; be rational, balanced, and just
- Avoid assumptions, suspicions, and negative perceptions of partner; always give benefit of doubt; must verify facts
- Gradually work towards overcoming one’s weaknesses; give the next person a chance; be kind, not harsh
- Never be defensive; admit your mistakes; Allah alone is perfect. Avoid cynicism, pessimism, aggression, and negativity always
- Anger is dangerous; it is also Haraam; control it by reading, water, wudhu, etc.
- Do not walk away in anger for more than a few hours; try to make up as quickly as possible with loving gestures
- Listen to the next person attentively, calmly, and patiently; do not comment right away; think it over; take time to respond
- Lots of communication is required; communication requires skill and tact
- Compromise is essential; marriage is not a one-way street; it is a dual road
- Consultation in a friendly manner on all major issues is important
- Balance the rights of everyone; do not be imbalanced; help one another to fulfill rights
- Learn to relax & unwind; be humourous, not tense and anxious all the time
- Be polite in speech & courteous; not rude & abrupt; do not scream or shout
- Forgive and forget; everyone makes mistakes
- Do not bring up the past; look forward, not backward; bygones are bygones; just as we want Allah to forgive us, forgive others
- Mutual respect is important; never run down one’s partner
- Help each other with housework and chores; a working mum has extra pressures
- Take interest in the next person’s matters; do not be selfish and self-centered
- Physical and verbal abuse is absolutely unacceptable
- Confidentiality is important; never discuss with too many people; consult a pious elder or learned Aalim if
- problems occur, but do not bottle up problems
- Time away from each other occasionally is healthy for the relationship
- Try and spend free time together, especially evenings & most weekends
- Money matters must be done with consultation; save, be thrifty; but also not to the extreme; (do not be extravagant)
- Have a medical check-up for pressure, sugar, etc. which can cause anger and frustration
- No point in attributing all problems to Sihr (Jadu); avoid doubts; if necessary consult only an authentic Aamil (read Manzil for protection)
- Romance is needed occasionally to revive the marriage
- Come onto Deen fully; Salaah, Zikr, Tilawah; attend programs; start Taleem at home even for a few minutes; avoid sins and change life
- When things go wrong, always ask: Where have we gone wrong? Rectify wrongs, give up sins, repent, and all will come right soon, In Sha Allah
- Never underestimate the power of Dua; ask Allah for His help at all times, especially when things are not right
- Each one will go to their own grave & stand alone before Allah to answer for themselves, not for others. With this in mind, do one’s duty and leave the rest to Allah.
The muhrim (one in ihram) is forbidden to do certain things because of having entered the state of Ihram.
The forbidden things are:
1) Shaving the hair of the head, because Allah says: “… And do not shave your heads until the Hady (animal, i.e. a sheep, a cow, or a camel) reaches the place of sacrifice…” (2:196)
Scholars have added that besides shaving the head, shaving any hair on the body as well as trimming or cutting one’s nails is also prohibited.
2) Using perfume after entering ihram, whether on one’s clothing or body, or in one’s food, or when washing the dead body (muhrim) or in any way whatsoever. The evidence for this being forbidden in ihram is the Hadith of the Prophet (peace be upon him), who said concerning a man whose camel trampled him to death, “Wash him with water and lotus leaves and shroud him in his two garments, but do not cover his head or perfume him with hanoot.” Hanoot is a mixture of perfumes that is usually applied to the dead body.
3) Sexual intercourse, because Allah says: “… So whosoever intends to perform Haj therein (by assuming Ihram), then he should not have sexual relations (with his wife), nor commit sin, nor dispute unjustly during the Haj…” (2:197)
4) Touching one’s wife with desire because this comes under the general meaning of the phrase, “he should not have sexual relations (with his wife),” and because it is not permissible for the muhrim to get married or to propose marriage – so it is more likely that it is also not permissible for him to touch his wife with desire.
5) Killing game (hunting), because Allah says: “O you who believe! Kill not game while you are in a state of Ihram [for Haj or Umrah (pilgrimage)]…” (5:95)
Cutting down trees is not haram for the muhrim, except for those trees within the amyal, i.e., the boundaries of the sanctuary. Cutting these trees is forbidden whether one is in ihram or not. Hence, it is permissible to cut down trees in Arafah even if one is in ihram, because the prohibition on cutting down trees is connected to the Haram (within the sanctuary), not ihram.
6) A prohibition applies exclusively to men is wearing shirts, hooded robes, trousers, turbans, and leather slippers, because the Prophet (peace be upon him) was asked about what the muhrim should wear. He answered, “He should not wear a shirt, hooded robe (burnous), trousers, a turban, or leather slippers.” But he (peace be upon him) made an exception for one who cannot find an izar (lower garment or waist wrapper). Such a person may wear trousers, and one who cannot find sandals may wear leather slippers.
A common perception is that wearing sewn garments means wearing clothes that have stitching in them, but that is not the case. What the scholars meant by that is wearing clothes that are tailored to fit the body or part of it, such as shirts and trousers. Hence, if a person wears a rida (upper garment) or izar (lower garment) with patches on it, that is permissible, but if he wears a woven shirt with no stitching, that is haram.
7) One of the prohibitions of ihram that applies only to women is the niqab, which refers to a veil that covers the face and leaves the eyes uncovered because the Prophet (peace be upon him) forbade that. A similar prohibition applies to the burqa. When a woman enters ihram, she should not wear a niqab or burqa.
With regard to the one who does any of these forbidden things out of forgetfulness or ignorance or because he or she is forced to do so, no expiation is due on them because Allah says: “And there is no sin on you concerning that in which you made a mistake, except in regard to what your hearts deliberately intend. And Allah is Oft-Forgiving, Most Merciful.” (33:5)
Concerning killing game or hunting, Allah says: “O you who believe! Kill not game while you are in a state of Ihram [for Haj or Umrah (pilgrimage)], and whosoever of you kills it intentionally, the penalty is an offering, brought to the Ka’bah, of an eatable animal ( i.e. sheep, goat, cow) equivalent to the one he killed…” (5:95)
To give the Azaan for Salah is proven from the Holy Quran-e-Majeed. Almighty Allah says in the Glorious Quran: “And when you call the Azan for Salah”.
The Ulema have stated that to give Azaan for the five daily Salaah including Jummah Salah, is Sunnat-e-Mu’akadah and if the Azaan is not given by anyone, then the people of the entire area are sinners individually. With the exception of the Fardh Namaaz, there is no Azaan for the two Eids, Witr, Janazah Salaah, or any Nafil Salaah. The time for Azaan is the same time as that of Namaz. It is not permissible to give any Azan before the time of that particular Salah.
One who gives the Azan must be a Sunni Sahihul Aqeedah person who is in his proper sense of mind. If Azan is given without Wudhu, it will be complete, but it is not correct to do so. It is not permissible for a person who is in an impure state, an insane person, an intoxicated person, or a Faasiq (open sinner) to call out the Azan. It is Makrooh-e-Tahreemi for women to give the Azaan or Iqaamah. Azan must be given standing facing the direction of the Qibla, with the index fingers in the ears. The Azan must be called out with a loud voice, pausing after each Takbeer. The Azan must be given outside the actual Musjid and not inside as this is Khilaaf-e-Sunnah (against the Sunnah) and Makrooh. This law even applies to the Azaan of the Jummah Khutba. Azan should not be given in front of the Mimbar, but outside the main Musjid, but standing in line with the Khateeb.
To reply to the words of Azan is Mustahab. When the Mu’azzin says, “Hayya Alas Salaah” and “Hayya Alal Falah”, then you should say, “Laa Howla Wa laa Quw’wata illa Billahil Aliyul Azeem”. In the Azaan of Fajr, when the Mu’azzin says, “As Salaatu Khairum minan Naum”, then you should say, “Sadaqtu Wa Barartu”.
It is not allowed to give an answer to the Azan during the Khutba of Jummah. It is important to remain silent and listen to the Khutba. When Azan is read, all talking should stop. Even if a person is reciting the Quran, he should stop and answer the Azan. Even when walking on the street, one should stop and give answer to the Azan when it is heard. If in your area, you are able to hear the Azan of various Masaajid, then you should answer the first Azaan that you hear. In one Hadith, The Holy Prophet (sallal laahu alaihi wasallam) stated: “Freedom from the fire of Hell is written for that Muslim who calls out the Azaan for seven years.”
Benefit In The Answer To Azan:
Once while speaking to a group of women Huzoor-e-Anwar (sallal laahu alaihi wasallam) said: “When Hazrat Bilal (radi Allahu anhu) calls out the Azan and Takbeer, then say as he says, since for every Kalma (word) Almighty Allah will bless you with one hundred thousand good deeds, He will exalt your status by one thousand folds and He will forgive your one thousand sins”. The women then asked, “And what is (the reward) for the menfolk ?” The Prophet (sallal laahu alaihi wasallam) replied, “Double that amount.”
Let us take some time to ponder on this fact, in the Azan of one day, there are seventy-seven words, and in the Iqaamah of one day, there are 85 words. If the Sawaab for the women was so great then imagine it being doubled for the men. Then think that this is for one day, what is the Sawaab of that person whose daily practice this is. Subhan-Allah!
Dua After The Azan:
“O Lord of this beautiful Azan and the Salah which will follow, give our Master Muhammad (sallal laahu alaihi wasallam’s) Wasila and greatness and a very high station. And let him reach the Plain of Mahmood of which You have promised him and let us receive his Intercession on the Day of Qiyamah. Without doubt, You never go against Your Promise.”
Other Instances Where Azan Can Be Given:
With the exception of Namaaz, it is also Mustahab (desirable) to give Azan in the following instances:-
- To give Azan at times of fear brings tranquillity.
- During an uncontrollable fire. Insha-Allah, the fire will be quickly extinguished.
- Azan can be given in the ears of a person to remove fear and sadness.
- At the birth of a child, Azan should be given in the right ear and Iqaamah in the left ear.
- Azan can be given at the grave-side to give Sukoon (tranquillity) to the deceased.
- Say Azan to cure somebody who is affected by Jinnaat or Shaitaan.
- During the time of the storm.
- To ask for rain during drought, or to stop a heavy storm.
- When lost in a forest, by saying Azan, someone will show you your way.
- Saying Azaan in your business or residence will increase Barakah (blessings).
The Takbeer or Iqaamah that is called out after the Azaan and before the Jamaah is also like Azan except for a few differences in Azaan and Iqaamah:-
- Iqaamah is given inside the Musjid and Azaan is given outside the Musjid.
- Takbeer is given softly and Azan is given loudly.
- During Takbeer, the fingers are not placed in the ears.
- Takbeer is read rapidly.
- Takbeer for Fajr does not have the words “As Salaatu Khairum minan Naum”.
- In Takbeer, “Hayya alal falaah” is followed by “Qad Qaamatis Salaah”.
- In answer to “Qad Qaamatis Salaah” at least say: “Aqaamuhallahu Wa Adamahaa”
- Takbeer must be said by the Mu’azzin and through his permission, someone else will be allowed.
- To stand during Takbeer is Khilaaf-e-Sunnah. The Imam and Muqtadi should sit during Iqaamah and only stand when the Mu’azzin says “Hayya Alas Salaah” – “Haya Alal Falaah”.
It is narrated that Imam Hussain (as), grandson of the Holy Prophet (saw), said to a man who was backbiting another before him,
‘O you, stop backbiting, for it is the daily meal of the dogs of Hell.’
A person asked Allah’s Messenger (may peace and blessings be upon him) who among Muslims were better. Upon this (the Holy Prophet) remarked: One from whose hand and tongue, Muslims are safe.
Are others safe from your words (back-biting, comments, sarcasm, hurtful jokes, fitnah, etc) and your deeds (retaliation, plotting, etc)?
Angels stand by your side, recording your words. It is better to be silent than to comment. “Speak good, or else be silent,” says Rasulullah (saw). Busy yourself with finding your own faults, and you shall have little time to comment on others.
Angels stand by your side, recording your deeds. It is better to forgive than to retaliate. Busy yourself with seeking forgiveness for your own soul, and you shall have little time to plot revenge or to ponder about the deeds of others.
When others are safe from your words and deeds, it means that you are now safe from words and deeds that will destroy you on Judgement Day. On that Day, Man will regret what evil he has said and done. He will be filled with relief, for all the evil which was not said and done. So restrain yourself, for your own good.
Will you not then take heed?
Ponder and practice.
Rasulullah S.A.W said, “An intelligent person is one who is constantly thinking about and preparing for death.”
Think about it. How does one prepare for death?
1) By seeking knowledge of Islam. So study about Allah, his Prophet, of good deeds and evil deeds. But knowledge itself is useless without…
2) Practising it. Perform good deeds, small or big, and avoid all evil deeds. But all performance is useless unless you are…..
3) Sincere (Ikhlas). To do lillahi ta’ala. But you will never achieve sincerity, as long as you do not have…
4) True Faith (Iman). You must
- truly believe in Allah,
- truly be in awe of Allah,
- truly depend and ask only from Allah,
- truly hope from Allah,
- truly fear Allah,
- truly put your trust in Allah.
But such faith does not come from reading books or talking about Islam or listening to fiery speeches about Islam; it comes from…
5) Striving hard in Allah’s path (Jihad). This does not mean going around trying to convert the world to Islam; it does not mean waving a sword at disbelievers showing them the ‘terror’ that Islam can inflict. It means fighting hard to cleanse the evil in yourselves –
- the jealousy,
- the greed,
- the stinginess,
- the arrogance,
- the pride,
- the laziness,
- the hatred,
- the lack of faith,
- the stupidity,
- the blindness of the heart,
- the backbiting and
- all the terrible sins that we do day after day, year after year until death comes a calling.
That is jihad. As you can see, this is a full-time job, that will take all your life to complete. But you will never start to strive for all this until you begin to…
- Realize that you will die soon.
- Realize that you will be shown all your deeds (good and bad) on Judgement Day.
- Realize that Allah watches you all your life and that no deed escapes His repayment.
- Realize that money, fame, and property cannot buy your way out of Hell.
- Realize that only iman and good deeds can.
- Realize that you live only once.
- Realize that you are responsible for yourself.
- Realize that in the end, you are the one who will gain or lose.
- So many people have realized, studied Islam, and yet have gone astray – becoming terrorists, extremists, and fundamentalists. Why?
They have forgotten the most important thing in Islam. Which is that…….
7) Islam is about yourself. Correcting yourself. Cleansing yourself. Not about fighting with people or proving other people wrong.
- In the grave, you will be asked about yourself.
- What you did.
- What you said.
- What was your intention?
Then Allah will tell YOU, what is your final destination.
“And do not be as those who forget Allah, then Allah makes them forget about themselves….”Al-Qur’an.
Have you thought of yourself lately? Every man who forgets about himself lands in Hell.
Stones and the rebellious disbelievers are the fuel of Hell, as Allah says:
“O you who believe! Save yourselves and your families from a Fire whose fuel is men and stones!” (66:6)
What is meant by the people who will be fuel for the Fire are the disbelievers and polytheists. As for the type of stone that will fuel the Fire, Allah (SWT) knows best what it really is. Some of the Salaf thought that this stone was brimstone or sulphur. ‘Abdullaah ibn Mas’oud said, “It is a stone of sulphur which Allah (SWT) created in the first heaven the day He created the heavens and earth and prepared it for the disbelievers”. This was reported by Ibn Jareer, Ibn Abi Haatim and Haakim in al-Mustadrak. Ibn ‘Abbaas, Mujaahid and Ibn Juryayj were also of this opinion. (Tafseer Ibn Katheer, 1/107)
If this opinion was based on something that the Prophet (saw) had said then we could accept it without hesitation or argument. If it is a matter of Ijtihad, based on knowledge of the nature and qualities of stones, then we cannot accept it without question. There may be other stones that are superior to sulphur in strength and flammability. The first Muslims saw that sulphur has qualities that do not exist in other stones, so they thought that it would be the fuel of Hell. Ibn Rajab said, “Most of the mufassireen suggest that what is meant by stones is sulphur, with which the Fire of Hell will be fuelled. It was said that it includes five kinds of torment that are not found in other stones: it catches fire quickly, it has an unpleasant odour, it produces a lot of smoke, it sticks to the flesh, and it is very hot when it is heated” (Ibn Rajab, at-Takhweef min an-Naar, p.107). Allah may create other kinds of stones that are superior to sulphur, and we can be sure that whatever exists in the Hereafter will be different from this world.
Another fuel for the Fire will be the gods, which were worshipped instead of Allah (SWT);
“Certainly! You [disbelievers] and that which you are worshipping now besides Allah, are [but] fuel for Hell! [Surely] you will enter it. Had these [idols etc] been aaliha [gods] they would not have entered there [Hell] and all of them will abide therein.” (21:98-99)
“al-Jawhaari said, “Everything that is used to feed the Fire or increase it is its fuel”. Abu Ubaydah said, “Everything that you throw into the Fire is fuel for it” (Yaqazah uli al-i’tibaar, p.61)