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How To Make Your Wife Happy?

The following is a summary of the book “How to make your wife happy by Sheikh Mohammed Abdelhaleem Hamed.
Beautiful Reception

  • After returning from work, school, travel, or whatever has separated you:
  • Begin with a good greeting.
  • Start with Assalamau ‘Alaykum and a smile. Salam is a sunnah and a du’a for her as well.
  • Shake her hand and leave bad news for later!
  • Sweet Speech and Enchanting Invitations
  • Choose words that are positive and avoid negative ones.
  • Give her your attention when you speak of she speaks.
  • Speak with clarity and repeat words if necessary until she understands.
  • Call her with the nice names that she likes, e.g. my sweetheart, honey, saaliha, etc.

Friendliness and Recreation

  • Spend time talking together.
  • Spread to her good news.
  • Remember your good memories together.
  • Games and Distractions
  • Joking around & having a sense of humor.
  • Playing and competing with each other in sports or whatever.
  • Taking her to watch permissible (halal) types of entertainment.
  • Avoid prohibited (haram) things in your choices of entertainment.
  • Assistance in the Household
  • Doing what you as an individual can/like to do helps out, especially if she is sick or tired.
  • The most important thing is making it obvious that he appreciates her hard work.

Consultation (Shurah)

  • Specifically in family matters.
  • Giving her the feeling that her opinion is important to you.
  • Studying her opinion carefully.
  • Be willing to change an opinion for hers if it is better.
  • Thanking her for helping him with her opinions.

Visiting Others

  • Choosing well-raised people to build relations with. There is a great reward in visiting relatives and pious people. (Not wasting time while visiting!)

Love Of Allah

Ten causes that result in Allah’s love for His slave and the slave’s love for his Lord:

1. Reciting the Qur’an while pondering over its meanings and what is meant by it.
2. Getting closer to Allah by performing voluntary deeds after completing obligatory deeds. This is as is stated in a Hadith Qudsi: “My slave continues getting closer to Me by performing voluntary deeds until I love him.” (Al-Bukhari)
3. Continual remembrance of Allah under all circumstances, with one’s tongue, heart, and actions. The extent of one’s love of Allah is determined by this.
4. Giving precedence to what He loves over what you love when you are overtaken by your desires.
5. The heart being avid of Allah’s Names, and Attributes and the heart roaming in that garden of knowledge.
6. Observing Allah’s kindness, goodness, and bounties, both hidden and open.
7. This one is the most wonderful. The heart is soft, subdued, and meek before Allah.
8. Being alone with Allah during the time when the Lord descends during the last portion of the night while reading His Book and ending that by asking for forgiveness and repenting.
9. Sitting with the beloved and sincere, benefiting from the most fruitful of their speech. And not to speak unless speaking is more beneficial and you know that it will improve your state and be beneficial to others.
10. Remaining away from every cause that comes between the heart and Allah.

These ten causes take the lovers to the station of true love and bring them to their Beloved.
 –  Madarij As-Salikeen (vol. 3, pp. 17-18)

Earthquakes: Allah’s Wrath Or Geological Occurrence?

WHY do earthquakes occur? A student of geology will say they are a result of a sudden release of energy in the Earth’s crust that creates seismic waves. That’s the process of how earthquakes occur, but not an answer to why earthquakes occur.

A better-phrased question will be: Who causes earthquakes to occur and why? Allah says in the Qur’an:

“Say: ‘He has the power to send torment on you from above or from under your feet, or to cover you with confusion in party strife, and make you taste the violence of one another.’” (Qur’an, 6:65)

Allah sends earthquakes as a punishment for some because of their sins and as a reminder or warning for others to repent and mend their ways. Allah says in the Qur’an:
“And We sent not the signs except to warn…” (Qur’an, 17:59)

Just as Allah sends down blessings for His creation in the form of rain, good cultivation, and abundance of sustenance, He also sends down warnings and punishments in the form of earthquakes and tsunamis. Allah says:
“And whatever of misfortune befalls you, it is because of what your hands have earned. And He pardons much.” (Qur’an, 42:30)

The above verse is of particular importance. It shows that whatever calamity strikes us is a result of our wrong deeds. Moreover, Allah pardons a lot. Meaning, the punishment doesn’t come except when people have crossed all limits. The place where a calamity strikes may have both good and bad people. When sins rise in a community and punishment is sent down, it also affects the good people. While that calamity is a punishment for the sinners, it becomes a source of purification or a reminder for the good doers. The Prophet (peace be upon him) used to seek refuge with Allah from His torment and punishment.

An increase in the frequency of earthquakes is also a sign of the Day of Judgment. The Prophet (peace be upon him) said, “The Hour (Last Day) will not be established until (religious) knowledge will be taken away (by the death of religious learned men), earthquakes will be very frequent, time will pass quickly, afflictions will appear, murders will increase and money will overflow amongst you.” (Al-Bukhari, 2/17 no. 146)

The prophecy of Prophet Muhammad (peace be upon him) seems ever approaching. Time is passing by quickly, though the day still has 24 hours. The religiously learned are fewer than in the past and the crime rate has increased multifold.

What Is Iman And Kufr?

  1. Iman is to accept every word of Sayyiduna Rasoolullah (sallal laahu alaihi wasallam) as the absolute truth and to testify whole-heartedly the reality and truth of Sayyiduna Rasoolullah (sallal laahu alaihi wasallam).
  2. One who observes the above would be called a Muslim, that is, if any of his words, actions or conditions does not reject, insult or falsify Allah Ta’ala and His Rasool (sallal laahu alaihi wasallam).
  3. If you reject one aspect, which you know that to believe is part of Islam, then this is Kufr. For example, to reject Qiyamat, Angels, Jannat, Jahanum, Hisab, or not to believe that Salaah, Saum, Zakaah, or Hajj is Fardh (obligatory) would make one out of the folds of Islam.
  4. It is also Kufr not to believe that the Holy Quran is the Words of Allah Ta’ala.
  5. To insult the Holy Ka’aba, the Holy Quran, or any of the Prophets or Angels is also Kufr.
  6. To degrade any of the Sunnats (actions of the Holy Prophet sallal laahu alaihi wasallam), to make jokes of the orders of Shari’ah (Islamic law), or to reject or suspect it untrue any known and recognized aspects of Islam is also definitely Kufr.
  7. To be a Muslim you have to, together with faith and belief, also pledge your status as a Muslim.
  8. One must pledge his faith unless there is a difficulty, for example, if you cannot speak, or to speak would mean to lose your life or would lose a part of the body, then it is not necessary to pledge your faith with your tongue. However, it is always best and a means of great reward not to say anything against Islam even to save your life.

Al Sadaqat Al Jariyah

Al Sadaqat al Jariyah –  The actions which outlive you!

1.  Give a copy of the Quran to someone and each time they read from it, you will gain hasanaat.

2.  Donate a wheelchair to a hospital and each time a sick person uses it, you will gain hasanaat.

3.  Participate in the building of a mosque.

4.  Help in educating a child.

5.  Teach someone to recite a dua. With each recitation, you will gain hasanaat.

6.  Share a dua or Quran DVD/CD.

7.  Share constructive reading material with someone.

8.  Place a water cooler in a public place.

9.  Plant a tree. Each time any person or an animal sits under its shade or eats from the tree, you will gain hasanaat.

10.  Share this with someone. If one person applies any of the above Inshallah you will receive your hasanaat until the Day of Judgment.

The Best of Muslim

“The best of the Muslims is he from whose hand and tongue the Muslims are safe.” (Muslim)

“The best of people are those with the most excellent character.” (Tabarani, Sahîh)

“The best of marriages are the easiest ones.” (Abu Dâwûd, Sahîh)

“The best of you are those who feed others and return greetings.” (Abu Ya’la, Hasan)

“The best of that which you treat yourself with is cupping.” (Hakim, Sahîh)

“The best days that you should perform cupping are the 17th, 19th, and 21st of the month. I did not pass a single gathering of angels on the night of Isra’ except that they would say to me, ‘O Muhammad, perform cupping!’” (Ahmad, Sahîh)

“The most beloved of deeds according to Allah are the continuous ones, even if they are little.”(Agreed upon)

“The most beloved words according to Allah the Highest are four: Subhanallah, Alhamdulillah, La ilahaillallah and Allahu Akbar; there is no problem with which one you start with.” (Muslim)

“The best of provision is that which suffices.” (Ahmad in ‘Zuhd’, Hasan)

“The best of dowries are the easiest.” (Hakim, Sahîh)

“The most beloved word according to me is that which is most truthful.” (Bukhari)

“The best of dinars are the dinar spent by a man upon his dependents, the dinar spent by a man upon his horse in the path of Allah, and the dinar spent by a man upon his companions in the path of Allah, the Mighty, the Magnificent.”(Muslim)

“The best word of remembrance is: La ilaha illallah and the best supplication is:Alhamdulillah.” (Tirmidhî, Hasan)

“The best of all charity is that which is given to the relative that harbours enmity against you.”(Ahmad, Sahîh)

“The best prayer is that with the longest standing.” (Muslim)

“The best of all worship is supplication(dua).” (Hakim, Sahîh)

“The best deed is the prayer in its right time and Jihad in the path of Allah.” (Bayhaqi, Sahîh)

The Messenger of Allah (ﷺ) was asked: “Which of the believers is the most intelligent?” He (ﷺ) replied, “Those who remember death the most and are best prepared for what comes after it. Those are the intelligent ones.” (Reported by Tabraani, Ibn Majah, classed as Hasan)

Reward Of 10 Days of Dhu’l Hijjah

Among the great seasons of worship are the first ten days of Dhu’l-Hijjah, which Allah has favored over other days. It was narrated from Ibn ‘Abbaas (may Allah be pleased with him) that the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) said: “There are no days on which righteous deeds are more beloved to Allah than these ten days.” They said: “Not even jihad for the sake of Allah?” He said: “Not even jihad for the sake of Allah unless a man goes out himself for jihad taking his wealth with him and does not come back with anything.” Narrated by al-Bukhaari, 2/457

It was also narrated from Anas (may Allaah be pleased with him) that the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) said: “There is no deed that is better before Allah or more greatly rewarded than a good deed done in the (first) ten days of al-Adha.” It was said: “Not even jihad for the sake of Allaah?” He said: “Not even jihad for the sake of Allah unless a man goes out himself for jihad taking his wealth with him and does not come back with anything.” Narrated by al-Daarimi, 1/357; its isnaad is hasan as stated in al-Irwa’, 3/398.

These texts and others indicate that these ten days are better than all other days of the year, with no exception, even the last ten days of Ramadaan. But the last ten nights of Ramadaan are better than the first ten nights of Dhu’l-Hijjah, because they include Laylat al-Qadr, which is better than a thousand months. See Tafseer Ibn Katheer, 5/412.
So the Muslim should start these days with sincere repentance to Allah, then he should do a lot of righteous deeds in general, then he should pay attention to doing the following deeds:

1 – Fasting
It is Sunnah for the Muslim to fast on the first nine days of Dhu’l-Hijjah because the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) encouraged us to do righteous deeds in the first ten days of Dhu’l-Hijjah, and fasting is one of the best of deeds, which Allah has chosen for Himself as it says in the hadeeth Qudsi: “Allaah says: ‘All the deeds of the son of Adam are for him, except fasting, which is for Me and I shall reward for it.” Narrated by al-Bukhaari, 1805.
The Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) used to fast on the first nine days of Dhu’l-Hijjah. It was narrated from Hunaydah ibn Khaalid from his wife, that one of the wives of the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) said: The Prophet (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) used to fast on the first nine days of Dhu’l-Hijjah and the day of ‘Ashoora’, and three days each month, the first Monday of the month and two Thursdays. Narrated by al-Nasaa’i, 4/205 and by Abu Dawood; classed as Saheeh by al-Albaani in Saheeh Abi Dawood, 2/462.

2 – Reciting tahmeed, tahleel and takbeer a great deal
It is Sunnah to recite takbeer (saying Allaahu Akbar (Allah is most great)), themed (saying al-hamdu Lillah (praise be to Allaah)), tahleel (saying Laa ilaaha ill-Allah (There is no god but Allah)) and tasbeeh (saying Subhaan-Allah (Glory be to Allah)), during the first ten days of Dhu’l-Hijjah, saying these words out loud in the mosques, homes, streets and every place in which it is permissible to remember Allah, to perform this act of worship openly and proclaim the greatness of Allah. Men should recite out loud and women should recite quietly.

Allaah says (interpretation of the meaning):
“That they may witness things that are of benefit to them (i.e. reward of Hajj in the Hereafter, and also some worldly gain from trade), and mention the Name of Allah on appointed days, over the beast of cattle that He has provided for them (for sacrifice)” [al-Hajj 22:28]

The majority are of the view that the “appointed days” are the first ten days of Dhu’l-Hijjah, because it was narrated from Ibn ‘Abbaas (may Allaah be pleased with him) that the appointed days are the first ten days of Dhu’l-Hijjah.
It was narrated from ‘Abd-Allaah ibn ‘Umar (may Allah be pleased with him) that the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) said: “There are no days that are greater before Allah or in which good deeds are more beloved to Him, than these ten days, so recite a great deal of tahleel, takbeer and tahmeed during them.” Narrated by Ahmad, 7/224; its isnaad was classed as Saheeh by Ahmad Shaakir.
The takbeer is as follows:
Allah akbar, Allaahu akbar, laa ilaaha ill-Allaah, Allaahu akbar, wa Lillaah il-hamd (Allah is Most Great, Allah is Most Great, there is no god but Allaah; Allaah is Most Great and to Allaah be praise).
And there are other versions.
This takbeer has become a forsaken Sunnah nowadays, especially at the beginning of these ten days. You can hardly hear it except a few. It should be recited out loud, so as to revive the Sunnah and remind the heedless. It was proven that Ibn ‘Umar and Abu Hurayrah (may Allah be pleased with them both) used to go out to the marketplace during the first ten days of Dhu’l-Hijjah, reciting the takbeer our loud, and the people would recite takbeer when they heard them, i.e., the people would remember the talkbeer and each one would recite it by himself; it does not mean that they recited in unison – that is not prescribed in shari’ah.

Reviving Sunnahs that have been forgotten brings a great deal of rewards, as is indicated by the words of the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him): “Whoever revives one of my Sunnahs that has died out after I am gone, will have a reward like that of everyone who does it, without that detracting from their reward in the slightest.” Narrated by al-Tirmidhi, 7/443; this hadeeth is hasan because of corroborating reports.

3 – Doing Hajj and Umrah
One of the greatest deeds that can be done during these ten days is Hajj to the sacred House of Allah. Whoever Allah helps to go on Hajj to His House and do the rituals in the required manner will – in sha Allaah – be included in the words of the Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him): “An accepted Hajj brings no less a reward than Paradise .”

4 – Udhiyah (sacrifice)
One of the righteous deeds that bring a person closer to Allah in these ten days is to slaughter the sacrifice and to look for a good, fat animal, and to spend money on it for the sake of Allah.

Let us hasten to make the most of these great days, before the negligent regrets what he did, and before he asks to go back and receives no response

All praises and thanks be to Allah, Lord of everything that exists. The most Gracious, the Most Merciful.Master of the Day of Judgment You (alone) we worship, and You (alone) we ask for help. Guide us to the Straight Way The Way of of those on whom You have bestowed Your Grace, not (the way) of those who earned Your Anger, nor those who went astray. Ameen